I've learned to love the pain , cause it's the only way that I know how to feel .

Sorry it's been so long since I've updated . Things around here are hectic wth back-to-school preperations and there's been a couple deaths within my family and friends this past week . I'm going to try to update more , but please note : school does start for me Tuesday , and I babysit full-time . Not necesarily a fan , but it's money .

I've taken to spending alot of time in my room with a book , and the music blasting . Lately it's been the same songs over and over . I've come to call them , The Soundtrack of my Summer . These songs are ;

• The Only Way That I Know How To Feel - Boys Like Girls
• Here By Me - 3 Doors Down
• Jasey Rae (Acoustic) - All Time Low
• Remembering Sunday - All Time Low
• Love Drunk - Boys Like Girls
• Ho Ho Hopefully - The Maine
• Everything I Ask For - The Maine
• Somebody's Me - Enrique Iglesias
• Thunder (Acoustic) - Boys Like Girls
• Weightless - All Time Low
• Cops And Robbers - A Rocket To The Moon
• Baby, We're Invincible - A Rocket To The Moon

Of course there's more , but those are the most played .

Recently , The Maine has become a big part of my life . Could it be the fact that come November 15, I will be at a concert of there's with Boys Like Girls, Cobra Starship, A Rocket To The Moon, and VersaEmerge in Toronto? Maybe .

Most of my updates these days are going to be short . I have alot on my mind . With going back to school and all the drama circulating through my family ... I feel like there's no one there to talk to .

One of my closest friends and I (whom we shall call 'C'), are starting to grow apart which is upsetting me deeply. 'C' is my life and he means everything to me . He's been there for me through everything since mid-December. I know it doesn't seem that long, but we clicked automatically. It's hard to describe unless you know me. Anyways, with us growing apart, I'm keeping everything inside again ... And it's beginning to take it's toll .

But gotta go, the kid I'm babysitting is awake.

I'll update soon .

SamanthaaLeighh . <3

Weightless - All Time Low . -My Views-

Manage me, I'm a mess

turn a page, I'm a book half unread

I wanna be laughed at, laughed with, just because

I wanna feel weightless and that should be enough

but I'm stuck in this fucking rut waiting on a second hand pick me up

and I'm over, getting older

if i could just find the time

then I would never let another day go by

I'm over, getting old!

and maybe it's not my weekend, but it's gonna be my year

and I'm so sick of watching while the minutes pass as I go nowhere

and this is my reaction to everything I fear

'cus i've been going crazy I dont wanna waste another minute here

make believe that I impress, that every word by design turns a head

I wanna feel reckless, wanna live it up just because

I wanna feel weightless 'cus that would be enough

if i could just find the time

then i would never let another day go byI'm over, getting old!

and maybe it's not my weekend, but it's gonna be my year!

and I'm so sick of watching while the minutes pass as I go nowhere

and this is my reaction, to everything I fear

'cus i've been going crazy I dont wanna waste another minute here

this could be all I've waited for

and this could be everything I dont wanna dream anymore
and maybe it's not my weekend, but it's gonna be my year

and I've been going crazy im stuck in here

and maybe it's not my weekend, but it's gonna be my year

and I'm so sick of watching while the minutes pass as I go nowhere

and this is my reaction to everything I fear

'cus I've been going crazy I dont wanna waste another minute here

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Ever since one of my friends (who we shall call Bubbles) , recently got me into All Time Low (here on known as ATL) , they're all I've been listening to . Now , if you were to just read these lyrics , and not listen to the music , what would your views on the song be ?

Once someone listens to the music behind the lyrics , views can change . These are my views on this song (please remember , these is only my opinion) ;

• This song , mainly sung by Alex Gaskarth , tells a story of someone who is sick of being looked up at because of looks , fame , and money (atleast , this is what the video seems .) This person wants to be looked up at because of his talent , not what comes with it , but life is going by too fast . When he claims 'turn a page, I'm a book half unread' , it seems to me that people are only seeing the fame side , when he just wants someone to see the real him (therefor , leaving him half unread) .

When you're famous , it's hard to know who wants you for your money , or who actually wants you for you . Many young people dream of one day becoming famous ... But tell me this ; do you want to lose all privacy that you've ever known ? When you're famous , EVERYONE knows who you , knows what you're up to ... EVERYTHING . I , myself , value my life too much . I'd prefer not to be followed around 24/7 by some sex-crazed groupie , or the paparazzi . But hey , everyone is valued to their own opinions ... These are only mine .

•SamanthaaLeighh•

-Cause there's nothing surgery can do , when I break your little heart in two .

Well , I guess I could start out by introducing myself :


I'm Samantha , and I'm sixteen years old , and hitting grade 11 (almost done High School ... Not that I'm overly happy about that .)

Now , I'm not about to say I'm the quiet type all the time , but normally I am ... That is , unless you know me . I have this fear of showing who I actually am ; only my closest friends actually know the real me .

I tend to enjoy sitting around home by myself , or outside (usually with a notebook or just a book .) My life revolves around my music and my writing .

Now , I love my friends . The true ones atleast . I have a few people who have stuck with me throughout the years , which haven't been the easiest with a crapload of family issues .

Hmm . I guess I could share a few of my favourites ;

• Past times ;

1. Reading
2. Writing
3. Photography
4. Guitar
5. Music

• Bands ;

1. All Time Low
2. NeverShoutNever!
3. Breaking Benjamin
4. Bring Me The Horizon
5. Slipknot

• Movies ;

1. Across The Universe
2. Wild Cherry
3. Twilight
4. Juno
5. Sweeney Todd

• TV Shows ;

1. NEXT
2. Gossip Girl
3. Numb3rs
4. MOD
5. PunchMuch

My beliefs religiously ? Well , I don't have any . Certain times , I don't believe there is some omnipresent man in the clouds watching everything we do . It's almost as bad as the aspect of Santa Clause ... I mean , he knows when you're sleeping , and he knows when you're awake . Stalker much . But then at other times , it's nice to think that there may just be someone above watching down .

Relationship-wise ? I believe everyone has someone out there for them , it may just take a little searching . I am single , but believe me , I don't want any of you guys . People who creep aroung profiles looking for a girlfriend/boyfriend are just creepy . My heart currently belongs to someone , just not fully .

Also , I'm not about to let out any overly personal information . All names (except mine) will be changed .

I guess that's it for now ... I'm kind of new with this .


•SamanthaaLeighh•

P.S. You may notice , I have a habit of quoting lyrics .